That awkward moment…
when you realize, you are being STARED at.
Yea, it happened to me the other day. I was in line at the grocery store, scanning the refreshing drink options to the left of the checkout line, when it HAPPENED.
I was deep in thought, as I twirled my ponytail, and contemplated if I should indulge in some coconut water, or a water spritzer. “Naaa, I’m good.” I decided. And turning my attention back to the checkout area, our eyes locked. It was the grocery bagger at checkout station #1. He was smiling at me and didn’t seem uncomfortable AT ALL that I had just caught him mid-stare.
I smiled back, sheepishly…trying to hide my embarrassment. It’s just a weird moment when you catch someone staring at you. You get it, right?!
“NEXT!” The woman at checkout #1 shouted. “Oh great!” I thought. “Out of the 6 checkout stations, of course I would end up at HIS checkout station!”
“Hi, how are you?” I greeted the woman behind the counter. “Hello.” I said to the bagger, with a more tentative tone. I continued unloading my groceries, but I could feel him STILL staring at me.
“What’s to BE loved?” He asked me.
“Oh!” I replied. “Hehe…I thought!” He was staring at my shirt. I had worn my “Beloved” tee that day, and all this time, he was trying to understand what it meant!
“Well…” I began. “I’m a Christian...”
“So am I.” He interrupted.
“Awesome! So, you know, He calls us His Be-lov-ed.” I continued.
“Oh! Be-lov-ed. I thought it said BE LOVED. Got it!” He seemed a little embarrassed.
“Well, that too! It is BE LOVED.” I continued, trying to reassure him that he was actually right on track. I wanted to go on, and if the circumstances had allowed, I probably could have preached a whole sermon. BUT, the conversation led elsewhere…and that’s ok, because that’s what blogging is for, right?! (j/k…or am I?😉)
BUT, I wanted to share that little anecdote because I don’t think its any coincidence that the word “Beloved” is actually two words put together- BE LOVED! We were MADE to BE LOVED.
It’s so amazing, yet, it’s so counterintuitive in this world. To think that we can just BE and we are completely LOVED. To think that there is nothing that we have to DO, or NOT DO, or ACCOMPLISH, or SAY, to receive LOVE. Even to think that there is nothing we have to BE, except ourselves, to BE LOVED.
In my last blog post, I shared about a pivotal moment in my life when I realized that I DIDN’T LOVE MYSELF. BUT, what I didn’t share, is the thoughts and the lies that had been bombarding my brain, causing me to feel LESS THAN ENOUGH.
You see, in mid-2017, less than a year before that life-changing encounter with God, I lost my job. And, for the most part, it was a complete blessing. In fact, God actually used it to rescue me in so many ways (that’s a whole other story!). BUT, for the longest time, I struggled with this idea of no longer working in the career I had spent so many years building.
I was successful. I made good money. I had a prestigious job title. People respected me. I was knowledgeable and accomplished in my field.
And then suddenly, there I was, in early 2018, with no income, trying to make it in a completely new career field and floundering about, to be quite honest. I had embarked on this new journey to become a Voiceover artist, only to quickly realize that the journey I had really embarked on was to become a New Business Owner. And it was HARD.
After hundreds of auditions, and only one paid job ($100 bucks total) to show for it, I was beginning to feel like a failure. I would flip flop between extremely structured days, where I had all my tasks planned down to the hour, so that I could accomplish as much as humanly possible. And then days where I felt so discouraged and confused that I didn’t know what was up, down, left or right and I would just spin my wheels all day long, accomplishing basically NOTHING.
I LOVED myself A LOT on those days where I was SUPER woman, accomplishing above and beyond what I thought was humanly possible. AND, on the other days, NOT SO MUCH. I felt like I FELL SHORT. I felt like I was on a constant rollercoaster ride, with the HIGHS and LOWS tied to how much I accomplished each day.
And THAT’S the head space I was in on that particular Sunday, when the Lord MET me and told me that I AM ENOUGH. Emphasis on the “AM.”
I don’t think that I’m that different from most people. We live in a world that tells us that our worth is tied to our accomplishments, our success, our looks, our fame, our fortune, our Instagram followers…and the list goes on. PLUS, nearly all of us have been hurt by people who have withheld their love from us because we didn’t meet their expectations or standards. We have been conditioned to believe that LOVE is EARNED, not something that is FREELY given. And so, we TRY, and TRY to DO, and DO everything we possibly can to RECEIVE LOVE.
But, it’s a LIE. We don’t NEED to DO anything to receive God’s love. In fact, there is nothing we COULD do to make Him love us more.
We were MADE to BE LOVED. It’s simply WHO WE ARE.
It’s time we ditch the “DO” mindset for a “BE” mindset. Knowing that the truth is, we are BELOVED.
(For the record, I can’t say I have this down PAT yet…but with the Lord’s help, I’m getting there❤️✝️ 💪🏻)
1 John 4:19 “We love because he first loved us.”
Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
P.S. If you're ready to shift your mindset, and you need a little help, we got you covered 😉 ➡️ https://aboundinginhim.com/collections/beloved-collection